This delightful dollar-store find seems to be suffering from a conflict between its brand name and its safety advisory.

These bath frogs are clearly labeled as being “Baby’s Choice.” The smiling person in the overalls on the right side of the package appears to be the Baby in question, who is making this choice. That grin would disappear quickly were said Baby able to read the safety warning immediately to his right.

Close-up of the label after the jump.

Although the manufacturers responsibly promise that the product is free from the recently dreaded Bisphenol A, the label still says it’s a choking hazard because of small parts, and therefore only for “Children 3 and Up.”

That does not, according to this package, disqualify these green bath frogs (or possibly, Dr. Moreau-esque frog/duck hybrids) from being baby’s choice.

Having spent the past three and a half years living with at  least one baby, I can tell you that babies do indeed make some terrible choices, sometimes as many as three a day.

Many of these choices involve playing with objects clearly suitable only for older individuals. Scissors, for instance, or staplers. Or claw hammers. It’s quite likely that many babies would choose to play with these highly dangerous, amphibian crimes-against-nature, heedless of the obvious risk. That’s the kind of devil-may-care lifestyle led by today’s modern babies. I mean, have you noticed the average infant’s personal hygiene practices?

So here’s to babies, and their choices! And here’s to finding the Baby’s Choice-brand claw hammer sometime soon at a dollar store near you.